Wow! A year ago today she said "Ready or not world, Here I am!!" I remember Ned and I looking down at her in the delivery room for that split second before they whisked her away to NICU.....and thinking, "Oh my god, look how small she is". As many of you know, we were told by the doctors via ultrasound, that the twins would be almost the same size. So, when she came out alot smaller than Cooper (she was 1lb 2.9oz, he was 1lb 7 1/2 oz, which makes a huge difference in babies that tiny) we were shocked. I knew in my gut that she was a fighter, however seeing her in the huge bed in NICU, I was so scared for her. I remember Daddy coming back to my hospital room after his NICU "Tour", and how visibly upset he was. I never really prayed very much, until then. But I prayed daily, and alot. I still pray every night, thanking God for her, because I KNOW that medically, there is no way that child should be alive right now and with hardly no issues from the aftermath. She is truly our miracle baby. I remember also how shocked the doctors and nurses in the hospital were when we found out she only had a Grade 1 bleed (which is considered just a bruise) on one side of her head. We found out via her next head ultrasound that it was totally gone.
By no means have we come out unscathed. When she perforated her abdomen at 1 week of age, she almost died. We came so close to losing her. Then, numerous surgeries for IV placements, and ROP, more abdominal issues, and there are probably even some things I'm forgetting. It's funny how you purge it. Or at least I have.
You know, when you're in the moment, you deal with it. Going back now, I realize how very hard it must've been for people to look at some of the pictures we posted. It's very hard for Ned and I. But when you're in the moment, it doesn't seem "that bad". When I look back at her pictures of when she was the same size as a BEANIE BABY, I am just amazed at where we are now. And I am so thankful.
I don't know how many more hurdles we will have to face, but they won't matter. We have our little Pumpkin. :)
Here are some pictures from a year ago:
Daddy's first pictures of the princess
BIC Gelocity pens
1 month ago